quote

Adam: Your guy just winked at me and I died

Ryan: My guy did not wink at you

Just becasue I'm a man doesnt mean I'm not a girl.

Becky Blackmon

I figure my hair is a mixture of ketchup and sunshine

Kayla

Its not satans pee

Kayla

I'm Trilingual!!

Becky Blackmon

I'll try one that you cannot manipulate with Grace

Dr. Mayers

Sophie is the queen of bodily gas

Steve King

If you chew less, you swallow less air so you don't do the nasties as often

Ryan

I'm redeemed in my slow eating

Ryan

Becky: Shut up, I'm not a girl!

Becky: I am anti-girl!

Becky: I hate shoping with girls, they take so long!

Becky Blackmon

scream1ngm0nk3y: I wanna be quoted
scream1ngm0nk3y: I should start saying random funny things
scream1ngm0nk3y: I can't do that on demand though . . .dang it

Becky Blackmon

Dreaming of screaming crack monkies!

Myself

I hate the bible thats why I came to this college!

Anonymous

Drive as Jesus would drive

CU Van driver instructor

The laqur smelled great, it was like heaven. No wait....the morphene was like heaven.

Ryan Nykamp

I like the dutch because they know how to give drugs.

Ryan Nykamp

I don't know what to say about dinging buns.

Katie

This is why I shouldn't be allowed to be a girl Paul

Mike

Me: Your nosy
Mandy: Im a girl

You don't have to go to public school to know about drugs.

Carrie

While hiking to a camp site:

Person 1: What keeps spanking me?
Person 2: Its the bread.
Person 1: I like it!

While camping:

Someone: That looks like a bible...
Jody: What? My toothbrush?

Jody

Lets go down the tool isle---I hate that isle....

Carrie, when you get back I will be a new women.

Krazy Keith

hey, ya need to be real...or else, you'd be fake

ma deats

I feel like a women carrying all of this laundry

Ben Kraker

I haven't seen you in 18 days. It's like I've given you up for lent or something

Ben Kraker to Andi

he was on the 15th floor of a 13 story bulding

Jody

Pedoitrist while getting a needle:

Time to get the happy juice!

I can trip myself, thank you very much.

unknown

but I'm the only one who can pull it off well in a pink power ranger outfit huh

Ma Deats

It's like a spiritual sugar rush!!!!

Ma Deats

That wordy sylabus--u know the one that has words in it

Phil Collins

hey its warming up, the snow is melting, and the trash is coming out!

Mark Tjapkes

hey i'm mark, i think i'm funny!

Phil Collins

Ben dials a number on the phone and his cell phone starts ringing. He takes it out of his pocket and looks at in confusion and then it dawns on him. "I'm calling my own cell phone! I was wondering who was calling me!"

Ma Deats while talking to me on the phone:

"I can't find my phone!"

Me: "Rachel---arn't you talking to me on it right now?"

Ma Deats: "AAAUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

My orange peed on me!

Ben Kraker

not hunting is like going to class with a purse and wearing a skirt

Dr. Sprague

Listening to country is about as good and as fun as rolling in cow manuer.

Me

PAUL! Another human face! Well...besides them...

Dave Freeman

OK, I gotta bubble

McKraken

Hilarry Duff is like a donkey while singing.

Kyle Black

In the story of Job when his enemies came down and raped the cows....

D.C. meeting mistake

Its not the Bible, but its cool

Ray

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilisation.

Gerald Weinberg

Programming can be fun, so can cryptography; however they should not be combined.

Kreitzberg and Shneiderman

Once a new technology starts rolling, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road.

Stewart Brand

Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind.

Donald Knuth

Any inaccuracies in this index may be explained by the fact that it has been sorted with the help of a computer.

Donald Knuth Sorting and Searching

You're bound to be unhappy if you optimize everything.

Donald Knuth

Just because you can’t see my grammer, doesn’t mean its not there.

Sarah Keith

"Foolproof systems don't take into account the ingenuity of fools."

Gene Brown

Making fun of AOL users is like making fun of the kid in the wheel chair.

Unknown

Who were the beta testers for Preparations A through G ?

Bumper Sticker

No printing is permitted of this book.
This book cannot be given to someone else.
This book cannot be read aloud.

— License terms for Adobe ebooks.

Phase 1: Uncritical acceptance.
Phase 2: Wild enthusiasm.
Phase 3: Dejected disillusionment.
Phase 4: Total confusion.
Phase 5: Search for the guilty.
Phase 6: Punishment of the innocent.
Phase 7: Promotion of nonparticipants.

Harsh Reality of IT Project Life Cycle

Person 1: "So what are they talking about today?"
Person 2: "Sin. Complete with pictures."

I'm gonna spoon you to death!

Angel

Teamwork: A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.

Despair inc.

Max out your credit cards for Jesus

The band Disciple

Angel: Theres a crevice in the couch
Jackie: That sounds gross
Angel: That sounds dirty
Dave: Get your mind out of the crevice!

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

Unknown

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Unknown

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

Unknown

If you can't fix it with duck tape you have'nt used enough

Beware of programmers who carry screwdriver

Dr. Rogers looks like Flava-Flav from Flavor of Love

Overheard at commencment

if you accept it and move like a mountain goat, you won't fall

My Twin

I'll hit you to get quoted

Tyler

Remember that time I spooned you to death?

Someone

Is that a regular zero or the letter zero?

overheard

In a mean voice
"Get me some water 56....please"

"Militia"

i just happend to cross my mind when i was thinking about food

Angel

Evangelina:what the kid makes me think of food
because he is one of those oh cake people

me: cake people?

Evangelina: you know the ones that are talking and then mid convo they are like oh cake
hmmm cake sounds good

Angel

Angel: thats 80 miles round trip
Angel: that would be more then one tank of gas a day

Angel

It was perfect poop

Ryan